HAPPY NEW FINANCIAL YEAR
Firstly, Poor Records Ltd. wishes all shareholders and people of all faiths and backgrounds a happy new financial year, and wishes you all the utmost success and happiness, which is indisputably quantified by money. These felicitations and well-wishes do not extend to any persons or corporate entities, living, dead, or otherwise who may or may not be engaged in litigation with Poor Records Ltd in either/or the past and/or future.
Secondly, Poor Records Ltd. is equivocal about announcing to shareholders and people of all faiths and backgrounds some of our exciting plans for the new financial year, all of which are geared to extract maximal surplus from minimal investment and organised to glean utmost efficiency of exploitation of labour legally allowed and/or dubious. These include our ongoing R&D partnerships with entities which may include, but are not limited to, those such as GlaxoSmithKline, Incitec and/or Imperial Brands (formerly known as Imperial Tobacco) in designing safer cars. Relevant propaganda campaigns regarding these endeavours may be taken in the near future.
Thirdly, after disappointing sales results and ongoing litigation resulting from the release of an Oesophaguses’s product entitled “In Loving Memory of etc.” yet another of these products has been placed in the research phase, being that of what is known, inter alia, as a compilation of B-sides and rarities, etc. We stress calm to our shareholders and seek to placate the market by releasing information in the form of video and audio from this and other records. The cover of this compliation will tentatively be thus:
