POOR RECORDS SHAREHOLDER MEETING MINUTES

MARCH 6, 11PM, SACRED VIRGIN MARY CATHEDRAL, PINSK

PRESENT AT MEETING: [redacted]

*At the last minute the meeting was moved to a closed online plenum due to time constraints, logistical and legal issues

*Poor Records CEO Fergus Q. Lurg was unanimously re-elected in his absence for the 187th quarterly term

*Rigorous action to further secure and protect the Milliard Archives discussed and settled upon

*Seizure of artists’ The Oesophaguses’s (henceforth known as sub-contractors) intellectual property by/for publication as/when/how to be determined

*Sub-contractors (henceforth known as employees) The Oesophaguses’s forthcoming album to be renamed and retitled in honour of the recently deceased British monarch Queen Elizabeth II to maximise potential profits as scientifically determined from the results of focus groups and double-blind testing

*Employees (henceforth known as unpaid trainees) The Oesophaguses’s to be made liable and incur severe penalties for potential losses resulting from publication of seized intellectual property

*Unpaid trainees The Oesophaguses’s to renounce any rights still held as living persons and/or sovereign citizens

*Discussion of pending legal actions against the region of Tristan da Cunha and surrounding islands to resecure the right to digital commerce and/or possible military invasion utilising co-operative powers and superstates

*Ensuring the continuance of Poor Records Ltd’s interests in asbestos mining by pretending lithium is being mined in an ecologically sound manner instead

*Operations to ensure unbroken supply chain of various substances for CEO Fergus Q Lurg to continue unabated

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